Give, Give, Give, Take ,Take, Take

Have you ever known somebody who expects you to give, give, give while all they do is take, take, take?

I know people like that only too well and it surprises me.

I don't understand how selfish people can be, or how they don't realize that they have responsibilities just like the rest of us and it is not our job to constantly bail them out.

I'm sick of it. I work, I pay my bills, I have some extra money to get by on  and yet there is always someone who wants to take advantage of me and have me bail their a$$ out of something they did.

And I'm not talking about kids or teenagers, hell I'm not even talking about 20 or 30 somethings, I'm talking about older people. People who should know better and should know how to handle money and responsibilities but instead act like they are children that should be taken care of.

It is unbelievable. And all I know is that I am done with it. It is over.

Still Trying To Figure It Out

I'm still trying to figure all this blog stuff out. I am only writing for my self at the moment and maybe forever but that doesn't bother me. I'm just surprised at how little I know and understand about computers.

Before I went to college in 1988, I had never even touched a computer. I remember walking in the bookstore on campus and seeing all the computers and wanting one so badly. I was 17 at the time and had no money whatsoever, so how would I be able to afford one.

I wasn't able to purchase a computer than. I did not purchase my first computer until I was 31.

I have to give credit to my college though, they tried to teach someone like me about computer but I never had any formal training. One of my first basic English classes was actually a computer class. Ahhh...the floppy disk. I could get by with using WordPerfect but my lack of computer skills were much more evident in my computer labs.

I attend college as a Chemistry major (maybe not my brightest decision). When we did lab experiments, all our data needed to be entered into the computer so that graphs and the like could be produced. That was the worst thing I ever had to do. It use to take me 3 or 4 times longer than every one else.

I'm still not those most computer literate person but I can at least hold my own.

To Know Or Not?

Has there ever been something you knew, you wish you didn't and vice versa?

I wish I knew why I am the way I am. Does that make sense?

I guess this has all come about because of the people around me. I have always said that I have a lot of useless knowledge in my head. And I do. My brain holds on to things for some reason and I'm not sure why.

Sometimes I can't put the right words together, I am socially awkward (although most people don't believe it) and I am a huge klutz (slipping on the step this afternoon and falling and hurting myself makes that one pretty evident). These are just some signs of Aspergers, a high functioning form of autism.

I would have never thought of myself as having Aspergers until listening to a friend discuss her child and his diagnosis. It all seemed very familiar.

How as an adult to I go about finding out if maybe I do have Aspergers? It would possibly explain so much.

Not to sound like a freak because those closest to me know it anyway but I have a strange way of eating. One of the signs of Aspergers is patterns. There is something that I have always done when I eat. Now I am not one of those people who can not stand their food to touch or does not mix their food (although only certain foods do mix well). No, if I have 4 different things on my plate, I have toeat all of 1 before I can eat the next and so on and on. I'm not saying that means I have Apergers, it could just be another sign.

It is the way my mind works. And I am not sure what it all means, if anything at all.

Family

What is a family? I have my parents, brother and grandmother but other than that who are my family? I have many extended relatives but none of them have ever felt like family. Over the years I have considered many of my friends as extended members of my family. Ones that have seem me through some of the toughest times of my life.
The friends that have become like family to me have because of the acceptance of me. My family also accepts me. The problem tends to be me. My parents have given me so much, I am afraid that some of the decisions I have made in my life would be a great disappointment to them. That is of course, my take on the situation. I don't know how my parents would really react because there have been some things I have not told them about or confided in. That is when my friends become my family.
Just like my parents, brother and grandmother, I am extremely grateful for my friend family.